A note

Over the last two years or so I have come to lean more and more towards existential nihilism. Being agnostic (now bordering on atheism) I have no religious beliefs or ideologies to lean on. I was not brought up to be religious, my parents were kind enough to throw the ideas out there and let me decide for myself what to believe. Anyway, back on topic. The more I think about it, life seems to be pointless. Relationships, both romantic and platonic, are inevitably unfulfilling. People change without warning, friendships end, emotions are misplaced, and the flames of romance are easily snuffed. As I am typing this I am finding it progressively difficult to see intrinsic value in anything.”..a means to an end..” to what end? How can we justify any meaning if there is no discernible “end”? To what end?

To what end?

Another rant for the citizens of the web

Anymore I feel like a man who has been put into a cell, seeing no one and wearing a straight-jacket. I have virtually no emotional or physical contact with anyone. I’ve got few friends, and fewer still whom I could be near if I wanted. Maybe I’m too cynical. Perhaps I am too quick to judge others. I see no point in socializing with people whom I cannot find common ground with. If we have nothing in common why should I bother creating any sort of relationship? If we don’t enjoy the same things or share similar views what do we have to gain from one another? It seems that the problem is one of two things

A: I am too critical, I expect too much out of personal relationships no matter if they are platonic or romantic.

B: I am unable to find people worth emotional investment.

You cannot fathom what I would do for a genuine hug right now. Just to embrace someone, to be embraced in return. It has been much too long.